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Salam. Saya nk rant kt sini sebab nya i feel like to type. I am the kind yang sangat and agak complicated in life, saya x reti sangat buat decision when I want to. I am emotional that part tak boleh lari. Tetibe teringin nk buat summary hidup
When in tadika i have always nk perform nk jadi the best nk masuk pertandingan. Haaaa so dari kecil ada konfiden yg dtg tah dari mana. Tadika taski ansar, and since tadika ni ajar pakai tudung pi skolah sampai sekarang saya bertudung. Ecewah.
Then masa sekolag rendah ni starting class saya dpt class ORKID. awak tahu hancur hati saya ni sebab ranking class is mawar, melur, kenanga, orkid, cempaka, tanjung . I was like ibu, adik bodoh ke masuk class no 4? Tu soalan aku tanya, kau mampuu then ibu kata, ujian xde lagi, nnti baru class betul2 kene dapat 100 markah. So lepas tu ujian dapat 98 markah je aku salah eja pensel, ter spelling pensil. Tercampur English malay, so sedih. INGAT KAN STAY CLASSS ORKID SEKALI MASUK KELAS MAWAR. yela ingatkan 100 markah je boleh masuk kelas pandai hihu. So throughout sekolah rendah, mentality saya is grade A is 100 markah. Ibu laa yg ajar macam tu. And i also joined banyakk competitions story telling, sajak, paling kelakar is science and selalu je menang. Hihihi so famous la masa skolah dulu and ni selalu perform time perhimpunan isnin. I am one happy small child. No decisions needed much.
Bila dah upsr, dapat 5a, saya nk masuk boarding school, meminta minta. Since ayah n ibu education takat biasa sahaja, so x penting kan pun mrsm and sbp bg ibu belajar dpat markah tinggi. Tp anak dia ni nk up sket, markah tinggi and sekolah asrama. I was a bright student back then a very good one. Bukan nk brag tp mmg itula hakikatnya, among the top 3 best even if mix with aliran agama. Sebab aim nya saya nk ke mrsm or sbp. Pmr 8a, so I did it, cari chance nk isi borang mrsm. And i get one.
Mrsm life is so good for me, i was timbalan President bwp, actually if ikut undi i scored the highest tp mana ada presiden bwp perenpuan tak cukup tinggi, so I get the highest woman can get for rank. Fair enough. Saya x penting kan tu pun, sbb saya x buat kerja sangat . Form 4 cemerlang, form 5 agak lingkup, busy satu hal, pergi konvensyen la pegi marathon maktab la, karnival maths laaa haaaaa tp sy x pandai math, saya just masuk puisi math hihi and menang ofkos, masa 2nd penyertaan kalah. Sedih sangat. Physics and addmath saya sangat teruk, and saya langsung xnk ambil tahu and i lose the title budak pandai or paling pandai di sana. Saya budak biasa so SPM pun biasa jeeee, xnk bgtau result. Hmmm i have realized that im doomed. My parents kecewa jelas riak muka masa tu. I just sedih.
Matriculation, honeymoon boleh la dikatakan sbb still sy xde mood dah nk continue atas beberapa factors tp saya teruskan study, result suam suam susu time ni baru la saya bercouple mcm betul2 gituu dengan budak matrik johor, so ada la satu kali tu ada sukan between matrix, and he x dtg, he passed his friend to bagi patung tweety hihihihihi and i met my best friend juga di sini hihi. After psm, result was not good for me and ive decided to put unimas sarawak as one of choices sekali dapatt. Ingat lagi i cried dkt kedai makan, masa nk bgtau pasal offer tu. And i went.
Unimas. There are a lot of struggle since seketul mijan nk bangkit dari kesilapan, sy study extra hour, pastikan dean every month and i did it. Hihihi grad dlam 3 tahun and cgpa 3.71 . Dalam masa tu banyak galau pasal laki, ada la a few comes and go and akhirnya semua asshole dh blah alhamdulillah. I have made a lot of wrong choices which either brought me to the correct place or something else. Bad or good depends on perspective mcm mana org tu handle and i chose my path and here i am.
Along the way i have a guy who stick to me since matrix, sometimes dia on off ada and xde but then ada balik. So i have decided to mcm make a move but masa tu we are not in the same page, he obviously onto someone else, saya sedih lama, even keep the email that i have sent to him masa tu and took a hard time to heal. Then finally i move on try to be with other guys but itulah akhirnya with him juga. We hav gone through a lot, routines, kepayahan, eksiden, kete rosak, sesat and banyak lagii.
Saya ni penyedih emotional ngada ngada tapi saya
sayang awak. You have changed me a lot. To be a better me. From saya yg suka cursed jd stop except bila perlu hihihihihi, awak ajar saya pasal oral care, tegur apa yang perlu, untuk jd wanita. Thank you sayang. You are part of my journey as most of my time spent, my sayang always try to be alarmes. Counting years, i love you Qutbi Putra :)
With love,
Mmnat
When in tadika i have always nk perform nk jadi the best nk masuk pertandingan. Haaaa so dari kecil ada konfiden yg dtg tah dari mana. Tadika taski ansar, and since tadika ni ajar pakai tudung pi skolah sampai sekarang saya bertudung. Ecewah.
Then masa sekolag rendah ni starting class saya dpt class ORKID. awak tahu hancur hati saya ni sebab ranking class is mawar, melur, kenanga, orkid, cempaka, tanjung . I was like ibu, adik bodoh ke masuk class no 4? Tu soalan aku tanya, kau mampuu then ibu kata, ujian xde lagi, nnti baru class betul2 kene dapat 100 markah. So lepas tu ujian dapat 98 markah je aku salah eja pensel, ter spelling pensil. Tercampur English malay, so sedih. INGAT KAN STAY CLASSS ORKID SEKALI MASUK KELAS MAWAR. yela ingatkan 100 markah je boleh masuk kelas pandai hihu. So throughout sekolah rendah, mentality saya is grade A is 100 markah. Ibu laa yg ajar macam tu. And i also joined banyakk competitions story telling, sajak, paling kelakar is science and selalu je menang. Hihihi so famous la masa skolah dulu and ni selalu perform time perhimpunan isnin. I am one happy small child. No decisions needed much.
Bila dah upsr, dapat 5a, saya nk masuk boarding school, meminta minta. Since ayah n ibu education takat biasa sahaja, so x penting kan pun mrsm and sbp bg ibu belajar dpat markah tinggi. Tp anak dia ni nk up sket, markah tinggi and sekolah asrama. I was a bright student back then a very good one. Bukan nk brag tp mmg itula hakikatnya, among the top 3 best even if mix with aliran agama. Sebab aim nya saya nk ke mrsm or sbp. Pmr 8a, so I did it, cari chance nk isi borang mrsm. And i get one.
Mrsm life is so good for me, i was timbalan President bwp, actually if ikut undi i scored the highest tp mana ada presiden bwp perenpuan tak cukup tinggi, so I get the highest woman can get for rank. Fair enough. Saya x penting kan tu pun, sbb saya x buat kerja sangat . Form 4 cemerlang, form 5 agak lingkup, busy satu hal, pergi konvensyen la pegi marathon maktab la, karnival maths laaa haaaaa tp sy x pandai math, saya just masuk puisi math hihi and menang ofkos, masa 2nd penyertaan kalah. Sedih sangat. Physics and addmath saya sangat teruk, and saya langsung xnk ambil tahu and i lose the title budak pandai or paling pandai di sana. Saya budak biasa so SPM pun biasa jeeee, xnk bgtau result. Hmmm i have realized that im doomed. My parents kecewa jelas riak muka masa tu. I just sedih.
Matriculation, honeymoon boleh la dikatakan sbb still sy xde mood dah nk continue atas beberapa factors tp saya teruskan study, result suam suam susu time ni baru la saya bercouple mcm betul2 gituu dengan budak matrik johor, so ada la satu kali tu ada sukan between matrix, and he x dtg, he passed his friend to bagi patung tweety hihihihihi and i met my best friend juga di sini hihi. After psm, result was not good for me and ive decided to put unimas sarawak as one of choices sekali dapatt. Ingat lagi i cried dkt kedai makan, masa nk bgtau pasal offer tu. And i went.
Unimas. There are a lot of struggle since seketul mijan nk bangkit dari kesilapan, sy study extra hour, pastikan dean every month and i did it. Hihihi grad dlam 3 tahun and cgpa 3.71 . Dalam masa tu banyak galau pasal laki, ada la a few comes and go and akhirnya semua asshole dh blah alhamdulillah. I have made a lot of wrong choices which either brought me to the correct place or something else. Bad or good depends on perspective mcm mana org tu handle and i chose my path and here i am.
Along the way i have a guy who stick to me since matrix, sometimes dia on off ada and xde but then ada balik. So i have decided to mcm make a move but masa tu we are not in the same page, he obviously onto someone else, saya sedih lama, even keep the email that i have sent to him masa tu and took a hard time to heal. Then finally i move on try to be with other guys but itulah akhirnya with him juga. We hav gone through a lot, routines, kepayahan, eksiden, kete rosak, sesat and banyak lagii.
Saya ni penyedih emotional ngada ngada tapi saya
sayang awak. You have changed me a lot. To be a better me. From saya yg suka cursed jd stop except bila perlu hihihihihi, awak ajar saya pasal oral care, tegur apa yang perlu, untuk jd wanita. Thank you sayang. You are part of my journey as most of my time spent, my sayang always try to be alarmes. Counting years, i love you Qutbi Putra :)
With love,
Mmnat
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