NO

Hey today is 18th. happy to remind that im happy to be who i am now. Really happy.

Whenever i felt happy,
i know that happiness soon will end,
either im too excited of it,
or really they thought they can game me,
which they did,
and i fall,
over and over again.

I keep building up actually,
Like im trying to find my real self,
Struggling to let people know what am i,
Who am i,
But i appear otherwise,
Hard and strong on the outside, tough,
Deep inside,
I cried so hard that only sleep can fades it off,
each time
I have lost count.

whenever i feel sad,
and i wanna cry over a guy,
i keep asking,
does he deserves my big tears anyway?
Though i still cry
No
I know i should not.
But yeah.
Sometimes we say no to a NO.